« From Satan's Asshole | Automotive Advice » |
Clicks and Bricks
I floss.
If that's too much information, suck it up.
I floss and I'm a curmudgeon.
I don't want mint floss or cinnamon floss or waxed floss or dental tape or flossing wands.
The flavors are just nasty.
The wax sticks to my hands and makes the floss so slick it doesn't feel like it's doing anything.
The goddamned dental tape is priced like it's hand-woven from the polymerized tears of caged faeries.
The goddamned flossing wands are just another piece of toiletry detritus to manage, they cost money, and they need to be strung with floss anyways or require you to pay piles of cash for inserts (floss snipped into convenient lengths).
Shockingly, I'm in the minority of dental floss consumers.
I prefer to check floss availability and pricing when shopping for other things, but who keeps floss on their mind?
I've wasted too much time and fuel over the years shopping for floss, like recently.
I tried Rite-Aid, Safeway, Lucky (née Albertsons née Lucky... morons), Walgreens, and Wal-Mart. If they had any unflavored, unwaxed floss in stock, they were asking 3.6 cents a yard, a bargain compared to enslaved faerie tape at 6 to 9 cents.
I found a website offering old-fashioned curmudgeon floss for 2.7 cents a yard, delivered.
Of course, I've now got 1200 yards of floss in convenient 100-yard packs.
I'll be set for a while.