Archives for: June 2008

Wipe Your Own Ass

June 23rd, 2008
Newsflash, people! If you don't use the entire packet of sugar (Holy shit! An entire packet of sugar? Hold it right there Diabetes Boy!), or the whole packet of non-dairy creamer, or you don't want to finish that belly-busting 1-oz sack of Cool Ranch… more »

And You Thought Salmonella Was Bad

June 10th, 2008
The road was closed while the Hartford Police Department's bomb squad came and blew up the chicken. Screw all this high-fallutin' fallacy thinking and world-class issues. We're talkin' exploding chickens here! more »

Fashion Nonsense

June 5th, 2008
I flipped through a Lucky magazine this morning, the "Ultimate Shopping Guide" and "The Magazine About Shopping". I saw a disturbing trend. No, it's not those too-precious little vest combinations. Not the clunky wedges or giant, server-platter-si… more »

This Should Be Easy

June 3rd, 2008
Yeah. Here's an easy one. If you see a toddler wandering around by herself at 5 am, you damn well stop and help that little person. You figure out what the hell is going on. You ask her some simple questions. You ring a few doorbells. You… more »