They say that the secret to writing is to sit down and write. I know that this is true from personal experience. If I don’t sit down to write, nothing gets written. The thing that keeps me from just sitting down and writing most of the time is that most of the time I am less than inspired. The whole “sitting down and writing” camp seems to believe that writing anything is better than writing nothing. If you write enough, maybe you’ll be able to winnow out the chaff and find a kernel or two. I know that if I wait for a kernel of genius to accrete in my head and pop out, Athena-like, I’m going to be waiting an awfully long time.
So here’s my weekly installment of chaff.
Things I’ve Observed Over the Last Few Days
Folks in New Hampshire and Maine don’t have the faintest idea about how to use a turn lane: You know, on a two-lane road, it’s that third lane in the middle… for turning. Apparently, the good folks of these states have yet to grow a brain and figure out this new fangled innovation. They know how to operate an automobile well enough and they know that they want to turn left, but they initiate their turn in the travel lane and turn through the center lane. If there’s oncoming traffic, a neuron or two must fire to warn the driver of bodily harm from a head-on collision. This means that the clueless driver stops with the tail end of their car hanging out into traffic. On three occasions I found myself stuck behind amazingly oblivious doofi waiting for a break in the oncoming stream of vehicles. When I brought this up with our hosts, they offered the explanation that the turn lanes were new to the area and folks hadn’t grown used to them. I would hope that even if I hadn’t grown up with turn lanes that I’d have enough brains, enough consideration for the folks behind me, and enough of a sense of self-preservation to keep me from hanging my butt out in traffic.
Maryland has some brutal weather: Very few times in my life have I felt like I was stewing in my own juices. I’ve decided that one of the main reasons for this is that I’ve only been to Maryland twice. While I was here it only reached about 95 or 96 degrees. It had been hotter in previous weeks. I’ve been to Arizona in July when the mercury registered 114 scorching degrees and it didn’t dip below 100 until late at night. Now I understand why when Frost complains about the heat, Hudson jokingly replies “Yeah, but it’s a dry heat”. Humidity makes all the difference. Humidity takes the heat and injects it straight into your bloodstream. Humidity turns your bread into a fungus farm in minutes. Humidity makes it impossible to dry yourself after a shower. It’s hot and humid days that make me wonder how a place was every settled. Survival can be a powerful motivator.
Land Rover’s little Freelander SUV is a crock: I reserved a four-door full-sized vehicle for the trip. What we got was the Freelander with less space, less gas mileage, and some seriously stupid cache. Sure it’s got plenty of gadgets, gizmos, and drink holders, but I can guaranty that the mini-beast is way overpriced ($24K!!!). The V6 makes a lot of noise (almost as much as the transmission) and eats a lot of gas, but doesn’t do much to move the vehicle. And drum brakes on a car at this price point? Give me a break. The whole package is about as useless as tits on a boar, as my mom says. If I ever see someone driving one, I’ll have to laugh at them.
Pakeha