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"Put that out, you're going to get us all killed."
"Pah. If I haven't died yet, I'm not going to any time soon." "Not if you keep waving that dynamite around." "This?" "Yes, that. And hey! Woah! Not near the flame, thank you very much." "Son, why did you hire me to set this powder in the first place?" "Well, mostly because you said you'd do it for five dollars." "So you're saying I should have asked for more?" "I'm saying I should have looked for someone who would have asked for more, yes." "Son, I was playing with dynamite since before you were born." "I find that hard to believe, Mr. Owl." "That's Burning Owl, boy... ain't no mister about it. You can take your mister and place it next to that vault for all I care. Let it fly to the wind and dance a merry dance of twisting metal." "I don't care what you call yourself, you haven't been playing with dynamite since before I was born... you couldn't even get it when I was born." "Don't you sass me, you green headed newt." "I'm an idiot." "Now you're getting the picture." "I'm an idiot for even talking to you in the first place. Give me that." "Look, you give me another five dollars and that vault will be blown clean off, I swear. My word as a shaman." "Shaman?" "How do you think I lived to be a hundred and fifty?" "You aren't a hundred and fifty." "Don't I look a hundred and fifty? I outlived my entire tribe." "For all I know you're not even Indian. You're just wrinkled and burnt." "You doubt me one more time and I'll have a prairie dog gnaw through your guts." "I trust you one more time you'll get us blown to kingdom come. For the last time, stop waving that torch around." "I don't see no five more dollars. Why don't I just drop this torch right here?" "Oh, and you'll be spending it all right when you blast us up and down this basement?" "Cellar." "Whatever." "Blastings not going to hurt me... I danced in the fire when I was born... I sleep on the sun and drink smoke. I'd teach you too but I'd have to sleep with your mother before you were born... say, where were you born?" "Massachusetts." "Well then, you can't possibly be one of mine, you'll just have to pay me the five dollars or turn to soot and bones... hehehe." "You want the other five dollars. Fine. Here. Have your money. You're crazy, old man. Why, for Heaven's sake, are you asking me for five dollars? Can't you see there's a vault full of cash right behind you? When we blow that up, there will be riches beyond belief." "Hah. Like I'd believe you. I stopped listening to folks like you the day I was born, and look how long I've lasted. No thank you, mister green newt gums. This here will do me just fine." "And that dynamite will blow open the safe?" "Aye, that'd be my guess." "Guess?" "I could be more positive for another five dollars." |