War Monger? Crypto-Fascist? Some might say these words are too harsh to describe Mr. Harlock. And yet I would feel free to tape them to his forehead.

A man so rooted in his own well-being and centered on his own success that he would genocide the entire Zombie race just for peace of mind. And would he stop there? Would we distinguish a Zombie from a Lich? Would be spare the Vampire to spoil the Undead? Certainly not. He'll be the first to stand on his high horse and burn the lot of 'em (1).

Would he stop at zombies, then? His lust for destruction in the name of safety slackened? Oh no... I don't think so. He would turn brazenly against the Mad Scientists, pitching the Fourth Amendment right out the window (2). Marlin Perkins would have nothing on the tracking-beaconed frenzy Harlock and his side-kick Sun-Ra (3) would institute. Twenty Four hour surveillance, mandatory status reports filed weekly, the works. But do you think Mr.s Ra & Harlock would impose the same restrictions to the Bill Gates of the world? Pah! Hypocrites.

Some argue that Mr. Harlock was not always this conservative. That this change has come upon him since he found out he was to be a father. And 'tis true, many a young liberal has met their cruel demise, consumed by the dark force of parental righteousness upon become fathers and mothers (4). Now, I'm no Dave Sim... I certainly won't preach to throwing babies on bar-B-ques, or removing a mother's right to vote. No... that's merely the voice of some rabid liberal-knows-best oligarchy. But keep your watchful eye on your newly en-younged friends. See how quickly they vote to get the lyrics cleaned up, and get the television made friendly, and have the schools made safe... oh, and have the mad scientists placed under lock and key.

Is this visage because Mr. Harlock cannot empathize with his fellow man? Some would say yes, but I say no. That is surely because there are very few "fellow man" that Mr. Harlock has met. Despite fixations on spacecraft, and large mecha, Mr. Harlock is not prone to travel (5). Many are the talks I've had with Mr. Harlock in which he describes his lack of belief in the world at large.

New York? Paris? New Brunswick? Poppycock. I've seen the false images on my television set, but those pretenders have yet to convince me. I've driven to work, and I know it to exist. I've gone to school, and so I know it to exist. But Paris? A city entirely populated by people who speak only French? Go ahead, pull my other leg. I'll believe it when I see it. For all I know if anyone were to cross the county line they'd as likely explode as enter another county. (6)

It isn't that he can't empathize with his fellow man, he simply doesn't believe they exist. Why support concern for figments?

Now I would never be one to take away his freedom to vent his ire and his wacky totalitarian beliefs... they are his to expose. And, in fact, I welcome his expositions... if only that someday, if I have children of my own, I can point to his ranting and say "Look, children, and beware, for there is one angry Arcadian."

i,jasona

1) And let me tell you, that's one tired horse. Have you seen the way it is sorely abused under his reign? With all the getting on it and getting off it every day, it's more a drooping medium horse. Poor thing should be put out to pasture to stud virtuous tall horses, and indignant upstanding horses, and maybe even a prude proud pony or two.

2) To say nothing of the unique way the Mad Scientists interpret and use the Second Amendment. And where does he think he's going to come by those marvelous mecha if it isn't for the Mad Scientists and their backing by the Second Amendment?

3) I can really only get away with calling Ra a side-kick for as long as he's away in Spain. I'm sure I'll find some defense within five weeks.

4) Is it any wonder that Darth Vader is so right for this image? "Luke, I am your father, forget your rebellious friends, join me in the dark fascist wrapping that is the Empire."

5) An activity touted and proscribed for broadening them mind. Something Mr. Harlock would surely benefit from.

6) Well, I haven't heard these words... per se... but I'm sure this is what he'd say if I did talk to him on the matter.